Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Some Thoughts

I just found out that a good friend I work with has cancer again. We will call her Kim. She ='s in her early 30's and is not married and has not yet had kids. She's battled cervical cancer for about 7 years on and off. The bad part is the more she fights it, the less likely it is that she will be able to have kids.

It got my wheels turning.

First, my heart always twinges at the "C" word. Anytime anyone talks about cancer I am glued in. It's this crazy family you never want to be a part of, but once you are, you end up finding the best and most inspiring people.

Second, watching Kim's devastation as she expressed the fears of never conceiving children. I guess this is a fear a lot of us younger cancer "patients" share (I use that term loosely, because Dan has the disease -- but it feels like we both do). I step back and I have two thoughts, tremendous sympathy for her and her struggle, and gratitude that my situation is different. I am so grateful that my "plumbing" is okay. It is so much harder when a woman struggles with post-cancer infertility than when a man does. I hope and pray that she will be okay.

Dan and I have our own road ahead. Sometimes it looks really bleak and sad. Sometimes it looks as though it's the worst thing I could possibly think of. Then Heavenly Father gently reminds me that I still have so much to be grateful for. There are so many options for us, and so much hope. I am grateful today for Kim giving me a "it could be so much worse" talk today. She was so frank with me and I appreciated her perspective on how I have been blessed in my situation. She was just the reminder I needed.

Please don't take this as a "Feel Sorry for Dan and Mel Moment". Rather, it is a great reminder to me to be thankful for the MANY hopeful and happy aspects that make up the FANTASTIC life Dan and I have. We truly are so happy.


Katie Rich said...

I hope that having children will work out for you and Dan in a way and time frame that you can be happy with. You are such amazing people, your children will be lucky to have you.

Anna said...

Mel, what incredible timing you have. I was just thinking about you while I was brushing my teeth. For no apparent reason you just popped into my brain and I thought how much I miss you and doing fun things with you and Dan. I pulled out the photos of the last time we saw you when you were holding Des. I actually think about you guys a lot when I'm thinking that maybe I don't want to have so many kids cuz sometimes it's exhausting. Then I think how lucky I am that we can. Anyways, then I get on here and you posted this. You are a good woman married to a good man. Just wanted to let you know you are on my mind. Love you guys!

A.M. said...

Mel, I have followed your blog ever since my now nineteen year old son was diagnosed with ewing's sarcoma of the humerus bone. Your words, your strength and positive attitude came through in each entry you wrote. We are now in the post treatment stage and every three months hope for only good test results. Thank you for your honesty and most of all for sharing your journey. You and Dan continue to inspire me and I wish you both many moments of joy. Adele

liz and lyman said...

YOU BUILD ME UP!!!!!!!!!
Always do Always will!!!!

Anonymous said...

I love this post, thank you!